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Sort by dates, played."Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!"
"I'm not surprised, sir, our chef used to be a tailor."
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Mr Green: My wife's one in a million.
Mr Brown: Really? I thought she was won in a raffle.
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A new supply of round tuits has arrived and are available from your secretary.
Anyone who has been putting off work until they got a round tuit now has no excuse for further procr ...
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A businessman called home, at noon one day, but the maid answered. When the man asked to speak to his wife, the maid replied, "She's entertaining her boyfriend". After sp ...
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My uncle said to me, 'Ants have got amazing brains.'
I said, 'Have they?'
He said, 'Yes. Have you noticed how they always know when you're having a picnic.'
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Men are like a pack of cards, you need a heart to love them, a diamond to marry them, a club to batter them, and a spade to bury them.
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Jill: You remind me of the sea.
Jack: Because I'm wild, unpredictable and romantic?
Jill: No, because you make me sick.
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Her boyfriend is so stupid, when they were handing out brains he thought they said trains, so he asked for a slow one.
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You know your boyfriend is in love with you when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life, but I don't want one of them for my husband.
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"I don't think much of your wife."
"Well, never mind just eat the vegetables."
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